Navigating Aging: The Challenge of Companionship

As a senior citizen these day in America, I find that many like to ignore us, and many have an attitude about the seniors these days, unless they are related to you. Aging is a natural occurrence folks, we all do it. What we tend to do as we age is be self-reliant and we get set in our ways and others don’t always agree with how we feel or what we do.

I know as we age, we tend to stay away from others, and choose friends and family to be around. It is easier that way, and they tend to put up with and tolerate us better. we learn as we age we had our highs and bright spots. I know for me, I have been there and back, but as I age now, I also know the possibilty of finding a female partner again is slim to none. I am a realist if nothing else, so I am handling being alone well, in my mind.

The hardest part of aging, is really, losing the one you love and having to stay here on your own. You lose the company, companionship and caring, you lose the one person you wanted to do things for and with. You lose the support and love they gave you in return. So, we all go through it I would guess, just it is not fun to do. So we make the best of it, by, doing for ourselves, and carrying on the best way we can, alone.

I know for me what I miss most is the intimacy of a relationship, with a female. The closeness, the interactions not only physically but mentally and emotionally too. So, I basically hitch up my pants so to say each day and carry on alone the best I can. Sometimes I may be happy, sometimes I may be sad and somedays, I may be indifferent to all around me. I don’t show it and i think most my age don’t also, we hide it behind a smiles, a laugh, and play the part of the happy camper everyday we can. Why because if we are hurting in anyway, we do not wish to braodcast it to those around us, we don’t wnat to impose, be a burden or bother to anyone else. We work overtime to be self=sufficient and stand on our own until we can’t. we keep the attitude of never surrendering as long as humanly possible. It’s all a part of life, in the elderly community we find ourselves in these days at my age.

We begin to realize we are old, and people fear aging. You shouldn’t but we do, it is all a natural occurrence in a human beings life. The normal flow of life is always getting closer to our ending and knowing it is coming. we prepare by saving money, and material things we wish to pass on to our loved ones. we get life insurance in case we pass. That way when we do, we have paid our way to our own resting place we wish to be in. We leave behind wills or trusts, telling those we love what our final resting place will be, and the funds to put us there. A process occurs when you get to the age of knowing, you can’t live forever, no one does.

We may voice opinions on politics, religion, or other subjects we have interest in. We may slow down and play card games, or dominos or such games, trying to keep our menatl abilities active and in shape, or we may run out and play light sports, to stay physically in shape the best we can. It’s natural although some don’t because they do surrender to it and pass more quickly.

I know for me, I have fallen into a daily routine I do, because I must. I do wake up a certain time, I do take pills and medications I need daily. I watch the news or play on my laptop online. I shop as needed and go to Doctors as scheduled. I am non-religious so churches are not my thing. I may build a puzzle, read a book, chat online or watch tv. When the weather is decent I walk a lot, to stay in shape is all and stretch my legs. I may go fishing in warmer weather, or try pickle ball, but I try to not to over do at anything. I have found moderation is the way to go in what I do or what I eat also. I search for stability, comfort, and enjoyment. If I am wrong for doing so, well that’s life, you do you, I do me is what I say.

In closing, I have found out, that the hardest part of aging is the loss of your companion, lover and friend you married. All of a sudden they are not there to talk to, to lean on, to communicate with, to cuddle with or to laugh with. You find yourself being an island unto yourself, with no assistance anymore. That my friends is lonely and sad, just ask me. You begin to fade slowly and you know it is happening and your instinct is to fight it of course, it is natural. We all do it don’t we?

I wish at times I had a crystal ball to tell me the future and how long I have left on this planet. I am closing in on the ages of my paternal and maternal grandfathers, who passed at 73 and 70 respectfully. So, by that I know, that anything can happen at anytime, and I am right to have a Trust and Will. Never in my life have I imposed on anyone, been a burden to anyone and I will not start now. The other thing one finds out as we age is simply, it is harder the older you get, to find a companion, lover, and the longer you are a widow or widower, you realize, matching with anyone else is basically, that much harder. You are set in your ways, you like what you like, and you dislike what you dislike, period. So, even if you use dating apps online, there is no way for many of us to trust them, and end up happy, due to using them. I find many want you for your money, for added financial help, or to use you for one purpose or another. There is no way, you can just find someone, who isn’t scared, or looking to gain something from you. So, I just do what I have as normal, I am me for who else can I be! I, be myself, I try to laugh, have fun and enjoy life the best I can, and if that doesn’t work for finding a companion, lover or friend than I shall be fine.