As we age certain events happen to all of us. We age slowly, we slow down, we do less, we lose people we loved and in the end we end up alone. It’s just a fact we all face and learn to deal with as we go along. In the end we make decisions based on what we believe is best for us as individuals, of course. It is important to remember we do not control all circumstances we live thru, we just deal with them as they happen and try to control what affects or does not affect us.
Anyway, lets talk about how I ended up in Westborough, Massachuetts here. I was a resident of Connecticut for most of my life. I left it, when my wife passed, because I could not live in the home she passed in, so I sold it. I needed help to do so and clean it out and to find a new place to live, so, I asked my younger sister to help me thru it all. Thus upon my wife’s passing, my sister helped me to sell the home and all in it and helped me, find a new place to live, supposidly to be closer to her. It is now four years this month, since I move here and frankly speaking it has been a move I regret in many ways. I am alone, my sister went back to Connecticut with another boyfriend, so, I know no one or nothing around me.
I bought a Condo in Dell Webb Chauncy Lake here in Westborough, Massachuetts. I am finding it lonely, isolated and not worth what I paid for it. Dell Webb built these condos and are working on finishing the 14 buildings they started. Everything they do is construction grade from the build to the appliances and even the heat and hot water and Air Conditioning. The Hoa rises yearly due to the newer buildings being built, and of course it is pay or leave, up to each person. Thats normal enough of course, but, the compound as it goes along is quickly, heading toward a project like atmosphere and living space. I know this because as a child I grew up in the projects of Waterbury, Connecticut.
Dell Webb Chauncy Lake here in Wetsborough, Massachuetts looks nice when you come to check it out, Anything new does, but before you buy, make sure you talk to many who live here and spend sometime watching, how it really works. For you will find some very disturbing things here.
I have seen arguments between, people, I have seen, people isolating others, and objecting to the way they act or do things. But, these are normal you would say, but not in my book. I do not need people telling me, I can’t relax and laugh, because I am making too much noise, at a public event. I do not need people asking me who moved in and out daily. I don’t care who leaves or stays. I am also not a very engaging, social type, butterfly. Please do not misunderstand me, I like people, but I suffer from Attention Deiciet Disorder and Hyperactivity also. So large crowds, I can not handle.
Now lets discuss, living in Dell Webb Chauncy Lake Condos here. As they build more the HOA’s rise of course. Repairs become a cost when the appliances they gave you break down, or the Air Conditioning or, Heat and Hot Water Units too. You must save to keep going here period, unless your rich. Now all of that is normal too no matter where you go. What is not normal are the attitudes of the people who move in here, and how they wish to control the enviroment and neighborhood, so to say.
My biggest mistake since my wife’s passing in 2021, was buying a condo here and moving in. What I have found is too many people with nothing to do, rushing to and fro, playing worthless games from sports to mind games, and just being rude to one another, or others they don’t like. I grew up and was brought up by parents who taught me a simple thing all need to learn. I don’t care about your color, race, your heritage, your nationality, your ethinicity. I care about whether you treat others with respect, and caring. If you don’t like someone, walk away from them don’t be rude. If you can’t understand someone, ask questions. If for some strange reason, you don’t like someone, for what they do or say, ask them politely not to do or say it to you again. You don’t just tell someone, tone it down, or you laugh too loud and are disturbing others. You don’t ask others, why someone moved out or in, and think we shall know, because we don’t. Look, I was a child when Payton Place was a Television Show on tv, I never thought I would move into a place that was like it. But, here it is.
Let me say something else, recently, I was told two people committed suicide here at Dell Webb Chauncy Lake Condos. Why, because they became disillisioned and isolated because others would not accept them. It’s not a lie, it is a, fact. When you do not accept others, or treat them with disrespect, people tend to isolate and avoid you. So, if you are intergrated in the community, do plenty of events and items, and you treat people this way, and you wonder why some stop showing up, well here’s your reasons. I know as a man and individual, I do not accept or appreciate people who think their shit don’t stink, or think they are better than me and they try to tell me how to act or not act. So I walk away from them and the groups they are associated with. I don’t care if you are hosting a game or event, or show, or dance or anything else. I won’t go where you go, because I don’t like being looked down on and treated with disrespect.
It happens to many who live in Dell Webb Chauncy Lake Condos here, and the ones that have it happen to them, do just what I am saying. They do not get involved in community events here. They stay alone. So, this causes an isolation problem for these individuals, who end up, alone and of course leads to depression, and issues with self-esteem for each individual.Thus we end up with Suicide cases in our community.
Let me say this also, Westborough, Massachuetts, even thou it has a Senior Center and is building a new Community Center is not geared for the acceptance of 55 plus communities. While I believe the Seniors who live here do appreciate the efforts that are taking place, they are far from enough. There are no Movie Theatres, there are no Bowling Alley’s, No Roller Skating Rinks, no Bocce Courts, or even Senior Dances. Westborough means well with all it is doing, I just think it is not aiming in the correct direction to be hosting 55 plus communities, like Dell Webb Chauncy Lake. The town thinks we are thier wallet, to make improvements. We are not folks. We are limited individuals living on Pensions, Disabilities and Social Security and our savings. we can’t continue to pay higher tax rates, to the town or State or Uncle Sam. We have to conserve and save to stay alive and to be comforatble ourselves. Anyone younger is doing the same thing folks, so slow the boat to china so to say, and lets, not tax out the senior communities in town. We are a resourse yes, for knowledge and know how. We are not an endless river of money, you can drink from whenever you wish, Westborough. Please keep in mind, we may be elders, but we are not stupid enough to let you drain us. So, please reevaluate what you are thinking and doing to the Seniors in town and in Dell Webb Chauncy Lake Condos here, we do pay attention and will fight back.
I know, some will read this and go, well if your not happy where you are move. It’s never that easy folks, when your 55 and up. It involves selling, buying, moving all over again. No Senior wants to do that unless necessary and in today’s economy, people who do are losing money on their condos they bought. Some are disabled like myself or worse and couldn’t do so if they wanted to. So, please remember when you say, don’t like it move, your wrong for saying so. Because your have no idea of a person’s physical, emotional or mental condition, do you? Or why they moved here in the first place, you make assumptions yes, I am sure, but, as people who served in the military will tell you, don’t, assume, it makes an ass out of u and me. Wake up.
I was asked to write some blogs more positive and happy. I asked why, when I am not happy here in the first place? My answer remains the same, why, write of being happy, when there is no happiness to be found here? What I found is disappointment, and isolation and anger, here. Not Pleasantries, or happiness, of joyfullness. The problem is, you can build a place to look nice, try to include all the amenities you wish, but, if, the people who live in it, can not get along, be polite and help one another, well it becomes a project, no matter the cost of the build or buy. People make it what it is, not the property. A person can have every materialistic thing in the world they want, but it doesn’t stop the loneliiness, The isolation or depression, that hits them, when they live here, for in life we all need someone, don’t we? Those who get depressed, do so because they are outcasts, from the society they wish to belong too and they don’t fit in. They walk alone, they don’t talk much, they hide and isolate, and become like hermits who only pop up now and then, trying to find their place and not finding it. They recede once more, to ultimately, talk to themselves, and no one else. It’s a problem with human nature and communities like Dell Webb Chauncy Lake, and most Senior Communities, in America. It will remain a problem, until people realize it and do something to overcome it. Thats life isn’t it folks? Sorry, if this is not a happy post or blog, to make you smile. Yet, in order to write a happy blog or post, one must feel the happiness, and in my case I do not feel it. I feel a lose of my wife, a lose of the life I once had. I feel an immpossible climb ahead that is hard to do, because of where I live. So, as I told one person, endings are not always good, in movies, plays or in real life, are they?
Last thing to mention for me. All my life, I have had a belief, the Good Lord put us here for a reason, and purpose. Each of us, were created for a certain purpose of which we do not know. We live on this planet to complete that purpose, it is like a mission. We do not know, what it may be, it can be to change politics, religion, minds, hearts or souls. we do not know. But, one thing is certain, when you complete the mission assigned to you, you pass away and return to, from whence, we came. The old saying of dust to dust, is true. And that my friends, is all I can say to anywho!
I will never be a burden to anyone, a pain in the ass to anyone, nor would i interfear or disturb anyone. It is in my nature to be me, and do it alone. For no one owes me anything, nor do I owe them. we are all responisible, for ourselves, in all ways, are we not? I think we are. No I am not suicidal folks, but depressed and angry and sad yes. For life is supposed to be a celebration, not an isolation, not living like a hermit.
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