Tag: god

Final Blog, MacAttack56


Ok, my subscription to Word Press.com is coming down to it’s end soon. So I want to say, blogging has been a pleasure for me, and I have covered many subjects over the years I have done so. It has helped me through some sad times, some depressing times, some time of writing of stories and books and poems. Through the times of ups and downs, attempts to recover some things of my past, healing some hurts and pains and even creating others. Blogging to me has been a blessing in many ways and I am happy and proud of what I have said or done with it.

Times are changing and I am getting older now and each day brings me closer to the elderly ages of many in America and the world and makes me think twice about continuing in it. The energy level is not the same for me, since my wife passed in 2021. I miss her and he input as well as her caring and loving feelings, she gave me and her encouragement for it all. The Period from March 2021 to her passing on August 1oth 2021, wa sthe roughest period I have faced in my life and yes I miss her dearly and always will till the day I join her.

Blogging has helped me to find my daughters, to know them some and to feel like I told them the full truth and I hope they understand it now. That said, I still get depressed about all the years I missed of their growing up, and the time I wanted to spend with them and the things and moments I missed with them. I wish I could have spent more time with them both, their spouses and of course, my grandchildren. Yet, I am not rich, nor am I able to overcome the fact to travel the over 500 miles to see all of them when I wish or they wish me to. Life, my friends and family is a journey, through which we must pass alone, and make the best of we can, and I have tried. I have laughed, I have cried, I have been up and been down, I have seen highs and lows of which few have experienced. I have seen the world in my days in the services of America from Connecticut, to New York, to New Mexico, to all over the world with the Navy. I accomplished things I never thought I would, my life was filled with 2 marriages, 2 daughters, numerous homes and more.

I have commented on numerous things, of political nature, of news, of life, love and beliefs I have had. I have commented on friends, events, views of where I lived, and even my wife and her fight with cancer and my own. The hardest part of my life has been the years from 2006 to 2021. I stood by, assisted, helped and took care of my second wife, Melinda for those years in all ways I could. While in the middle 2013, I suffered my own bout of cancer and lost a lobe and a third of my right lung and survived it. And continued on taking care of my Melinda, until her passing in August of 2021.

I thank my sister, who helped me through all of it, for without her I would have been lost and frozen in time God Bless her for being there for me, and supporting me in all the ways she has. There is nothing better in life than, to have a sibling who is close to you all the time. A sister rs a blessing, I hope all, can have in life.

As. this is my final blog, more than likely, because, I basically can’t see how I can stay at it, at 68 years old, I want to say one thing to all who ever read my blogs, Thank You for doing so! We may not have agreed on many subjects or ideas I blogged about, but, I thank all who read them. We may not agree on politics or what we believe about some politicians or laws, or things that happened in the world, but at least, I was able to voice them by blogging so thank you WordPress.com also.

In closing let me say this, it has been an adventure and a honor to be able to blog to the world, and to have a small part of it hear my voice and what I believed in and more. Thank you to ALL !!! I did write many poems, that are out there now in the ether of the internet, on Amazon.com, small stories and books, I never claimed to be a real writer, I did them with encouragement of my now deceased wife, at her asking me to. They will remain out there for who ever reads them or likes them or even those who don’t. I tried only because of my deceased wife wo said, I had stories to tell, and I should tell them.

Be well all, and as time marches on, I hope, you all, stay healthy, happy, get wealthy and live a life you love ! God Bless !

Reflections/Resolutions 2024


 Life can be amazing, an adventure, an enjoyment, or it can be mundane, lonely, and make you wonder, what the hell your here for ! I never claimed to be apopular person and never was really, I had my difficulties as a kid, bullied in school, did not fit in in my younger days thats for sure. I had conflicts with my mother, my older brother, and of course my step-father. Some I overcame as I grew, like, my elder brother I ignored, my mother and I came to an understanding after I got old enough to investigate her some and figure out things. But each brought me new knowledge of them and the world I have to live in. It doesn’t matter what those moments were as you age, what does matter is what you make from them, as you move on.

 I know I learned many things in life about it in general, love, respect, honesty, integerity, and pride come to mind. I also learned that relationships happen and they form over decency for one another. Shit, I have friends from when I was fourteen years old, friendships may fade some, but they never disappear as we move on. Families scatter and go their own ways, but, we still find a way to carry on don’t we?

 I reflect many times in my life backon my experiences in it and the people that have left or passed I knew. The famous ones to the mundane and everday ones you walk by daily, each affect us differently. Some you admire because they are family and have departed for the love they gave you, the care they did do for you, and then others you remember for the good times, the laughing, the jokes, good or bad, the tears, the fears, the chances you took with them and more. It is amazing how much the human mind remembers as you age and how much it may tend to ignore or forget also. The painful times we tend to forget, the ones who got away that we loved, or the ones that have passed before us. Yet, The good Lord is the one guiding and directing and leading us to go on till, we can no more and we complete the missions we have been put here for !

  Two seems a very important numbe rin my life and world. I had two marriages, two children and I have no idea how they happened. I never learned to flirt, or what to say to the female species. Yet, I wasmarried twice, have two children and find myself with four grandchildren who live 600 miles away from me. They do not know me, my own children were lost to me in my divorce from my first wife. And it was my second wife who encouraged me to go see them when she was alive. I did so of course as much as i could handle it, but, I am not rich and I really do not think like they do, that I owe them anything. I sometimes think they should stop and realize, the divorce from their mother, was not my fault number one, and number two I lost like they did, and more than I would admit or want to. The courts do not favor the male of the couple when divorce happens and the females are believed no matter what and protected, even when they lie. I know i suffered from it and still do today.

 Yet, I went on to do things I never thought I could, I found a second wife, a second life and much more. The first marriage went 10 years and then two for the divorce, then the second marriage lasted me 28 years. So you might say, I did something right in it, and I wish it was still happening today, but, cancer took her from me. We all learn and adjust as we go along folks. experiences we had, lead us to make the decisions we do each day, we draw from the past to make the present work daily, never forget that. It is a lesson we all learn as we grow older, mature and find our way in the world we live in.

 We can’t change somethings and others we have control over. Yet we learn and adapt to what we face as we go along, or if we do not, we suffer for not doing so. My life is like a roller coaster with it’s ups and downs, but, my second wife put a steadying hand on me and helped me through the rough times. She got me to go back to school, to graduate college, to stabilize and learn again. She encouraged me to learn, expand, become better, and at the sametime loved me. I miss her dearly and always will. As she knew and stated at one time, she told her own daughter, when she passes I would be fine because I am a realist. Fine I don’t know, but surviving I do, and I am so far and she has been gone since 2o21 and we just entered 2024.

 Someone asked me, what my resolutions are for 2024. I stopped and thought for a moment then. I haven’t really made any, but, if I did it would be to talk to more people, get out more, and hopefully meet a woman who is intelligent, fun and wnats a companion. I miss that ion my life and I miss a smiling face to smile back at, someone to converse with and help, and who wants the same in return. So, my basic idea is to move on as I turn 68 soon and do the best I can to smile, laugh, talk, joke and interact with others, and be myself the best I can. No one is perfect, no one expects you to be, but, if we are honest, loyal, ourselves, and we care enough, we can at least have fun in 2024.

 

 

My Religious Thoughts/ My Beliefs


      I received a comment today on a piece I wrote about Jesus and The Bible, claiming I only skirted the issue and know very little about religion or Jesus Christ. I never said I was an authority on this subject, just that I was expressing my views on it and why I chose not to be dedicated to it or attend church on a weekly basis or even holidays of the church. I find it interesting that a reader would send a comment such as the one, I got. It means to me, that someone was reading and it hit a sore spot in their beliefs and they decided to comment. Good for you!

       As I said before and I shall say again, religion is a choice, some choose to follow and dedicate themselves to and others do not. Religion to me is not the full commitment to a church or a certain religion, it is an internal belief you carry with you daily in your heart, mind and soul. ,yet you do not need a Paster, a Preacher, a Priest to tell you to believe, or to give penance or how to pray. Nor do you have to pay for a religion to build a church, please read your own Bibles if you think I am wrong, one of the first things it does say is, God sees and hears all, no matter where you are!

      Jesus is a figure in time, who was made into a Savior by the Disciples surrounding him and believing in the way he lived and wanted to live. Yet research will show you the man in mortal form had his own faults just like me and you. His story resounds the way it does, because of the portrayal put into pictures and words, not because it is the truth. If you create a church and want a pack of people to follow you, you must have a strong symbol they can worship and believe in.

        The Bible itself, with each chapter and verse is a long tale of creation, exodus, and saving. Each chapter or book is written by a different man, a human being, the imperfections of it can be found if you study it closely. Now I can not say if the events, people or places and times are correct, but I can say this, as a writer and story-teller it is easy to see how the story could be handed down generation to generation to get it completed and accepted by churches world-wide.  Ever wonder how or why we have two versions alone just in the Christian Faith, never mind what the Muslims have and believe, or the Hindus, or the Jews. Why is that so, and where did they all come from? So many stories are written on Jesus, and the times of his life. The stories alone of the creation of the world and the powers it took to create it, well, you can see what I am getting to.

       To the person or persons who made their comment on what I wrote I give you this as my answer, I lived the Catholic Faith from birth to the age of 12 years old. I was baptised, I made my Communion, and Confirmation and went to Sunday School and read my bible many times over. Religion is still a choice, not a forced item in world and American culture. We choose what we believe because it is indeed a constitutional right in America. I tire of people who believe and then force their religion on others or attempt to do so, it is wrong. So please don’t come in my direction telling me I don’t understand religion, Jesus or the Bible, because I do very well. Step back yourself and question your own beliefs and make sure you are right enough to believe them yourself, before you try to force them on another.

       The Catholic Church and many other Religions do not allow women Priest or Paster and that in and of itself is wrong also in my book. Mother Mary could have preached and I believe had her own book for the bible which the Catholic Church disallowed in theirs. Sadly, the simple act of not allowing female Priests or Preachers is wrong, for God Created all Men Equal and that includes women.

         Yes I know there are many different Religions, many different beliefs, all I ask is a right to choose what I want to believe in and not be forced to believe in something I don’t. I also reserve and protect my freedom of speech, whether in the verbal sense or written sense thank you. I shall write, talk and live free, in the Land of The Free !.

      One more note before I end, The Churches of the WOrld are hypocrital, in many ways, and childrena nd young adults have been molested and sexually abused by Priests, Preacher and more world over. They take the one with the accussations against them and swap them from one church to anothe rto hide them, but it doesn’t stop the abuse and molestations.  So if the Chjurch no matter what Religion, does not allow female Priests or Preachers, does not stop the sexual abuse and molestations of children and young adults that happens daily, why should i go to a hypocrital organization totpractice my faith or beliefs when I don’t believe in what it is doing itself.