I am lost, but the days tick by anyway.

Ok, Sunday is upon us all, the sun is up and it is a chilly November 12th, 2023.

The mess that is the political climate in America gets worse daily as we close in on another possible government shutdown. I think if Americans get tired of this happening, we should stop the pay checks and benefits of the members of the House and Senate, if it shuts down too. They wouldn’t pay us if we didnt do our jobs, so why pay them when they don’t either. !

Next, The Trump fiasco that has been going on since 2015 must stop. Lets face it, Trump failed in his businesses, he failed to sell water, steaks, a college and more, and he stiff the contractorsw ho worked for him. He lies about his self fortune and on hos taxes and more. He has been Impeached twic ein one term as President, historic by the way, and now is Indicted 4 times with 91 charges and has lost many libel suites too. Now he wants to get Elected again as President and turn us into a autocratis country bordering on cummunism, nope in my book, Lock Him Up!

Now all of the above issues go on daily in America, and our economy needs to be repaired and fixed. I am sure it will be in due time, as long as we stay a democracy and a republic as our forefathers said we should.

Last subject for me this Sunday, November 12th, 2023. I am 67 years old now and will be 68 in January of 2024 if i make it there. I am a Widower, and I live alone in a condo in Westborough, Mass here. No I do not have a woman in my life at this time and date. Some would ask why, others don’t bother, but thats fine with me either way. My life is indeed a lonely one, in a 55 plus community and I stay to myself, so I am not judged by others, and I do not get involved with any widowed, or divorced women who live here. Why is simple, because anytime a relationship goes sore between a woman and a man, the man is normally blamed no matter what. In a closed society and complex like a 55 plus community that is very dangerous for a man period. In no time at all, a man would be forced to move to survive, period. So I don’t go there, momma didn’t raise any idiots or fools sorry.

Do I want to stay alone as a single man who is widowed, not really! I would prefer female companionship of course. So I do what many do, I look at dating apps on the internet, and scan or swipe through pictures and profiles, hoping to find someone, no luck for me now in over 2 years doing so.

I have tried Zoosk, I have looked at Match, and more. Senior Dating apps also, but no luck so far. Plus I have noticed they all cost money to go on and chat with women. The apps for dating for seniors cost money to get into and even try. So I don’t want to keep putting money into dating apps and getting turned down, ignored, and overlooked the way it happens now. I wonder if there is a dating app for people my age out there, that actually works, but I doubt it mostly. I had a grandson tell me to try Tinder, I laughed it doesn’t work when your my age, son.

We age, and as one man said we get married, and then we are not married anymore and have no idea what to do next. Marriage as the man said ends in two ways, divorce or death, and neither one is a good ending is it? Then which ever way it ends, you get set in your ways and you stay set in them, because your comfortable there. Then ya have to deal with the anxieties and fears and scares of the dating scene if you attempt to enter it again! Am I too old, am I too ugly, am I too mean, or grouchy or grumpy or whatever you ask yourself and then you just go ok, I will stay alone. You don’t want to put yourself out there, just to be shot down, again and again and again. So I just surrendered and gave up on dating apps, I don’t drink so bars don’t work for me either. Besides how many 67 and up men do you really think are wanted by women, none I would say, they all want someone younger, more active, is all. They don’t want a homebody type, who cooks, cleans and takes care of themself, they want adventure. lol

So I wonder where to look and what to do in today’s society here, when all I seek is a decent woman, who wants a companion to spend time with and to enjoy life, laughter and fun? Plus I know the dating apps cost money and time and effort, and women are suspisious and scarred also, using them. Or you run into ones who talk a good time or a decent meeting but don’t show up, the no shows. Happens all the time out there, so why take a chance when your safe as you are now? I surrendered basically, and just accept the fact, I am 67, alone, my wife passed, made me a widower, and I have to accept it and live with it. So, I do.

There is no answer to the situation, when your a widower, you just have to learn to be alone and accept it. So, I am doing just that. I know for me, I shall probally, never meet another woman to date or be with, ageism is a factor, and since I don’t drink, or party in anyway, and dating apps don’t work for me, this is life. I walk, I read, I build puzzles, I chat online, I watch tv and movies, I play billards once a week when available. Life goes on, but, for me, it will always be a lonely time and probally a lonely ending too. I accept what the fates and destiny bring me, and I deal with it daily.

It’s life as you get older is all, so I do what I can. I like to fish now and then also, but not a lot any more. Life is indeed a problem as you age, the loneliness syndrome in america as a societial problem is real. We fear involvement with others and are scarred of being taken for money or used and abused, so we stay alone. American Society is not what it used to be anymore, it is scarry and nasty out there, people get cruel. So, as to what to do about it all, I am lost, but the days tick by anyway.