I have listened to some people, looking for partners in the Bdsm/ D/s World online and in Real life. I find that the hardest part of it all is that people tend not to communicate well with one another. Some just come to the lifestyle looking for just sex and to fulfill their kinks and move on.
If you want a relationship in BDSM or D/s or both, fine, but do yourself a favor and learn to listen to who your with. Many just give orders or make demands, if you listen to your partner, you would know what they like and what turns them on and what makes them like or want to be with you.
Clear communication is not just telling your side, it’s listening to the other side, who is your partner, too. So sit down if your having trouble, openly talk and don’t be afraid to say how you feel about anything. Honesty, straight forwardness. compassion, caring and in the end, compromise goes a long way folks.
When I say compassion I mean have some empathy for your partner, care about what they want, and listen honestly and with full attention.
If you Don’t listen and openly communicate you may not last in a relationship, whether it is in this lifestyle or vanilla, if you get the drift ok.
What we all want is someone we can respect and who respects us in return, someone we can get along with, grow with and in the end have something lasting, if you ask me.
Before you jump into any relationship, look at yourself, know thyself first, know your own kinks, likes, desires and then also know what your hard limits are and what you hate too. Be able to convey and talk about it all openly with someone you know or like a lot and are attracted to, be honest. For if you hide something, lie about yourself or don’t convey something clearly, you will lose out. So remember open communication is not just shouting what you like out at someone, it is also listening in return and compromising to a point of both sides being satisfied in the end.