I am at a stage now, where after my wife passed, I feel in limbo, lost, reaching for answers and trying to get things done, I can no longer take care of on my own. I have done all I could for my wife before she died, running her through Hospitals, Rehab Facilities twice, and then in the end bringing her home to our home, under hospice care and my care. I did as she requested and buried her under what she requested, no production, no show just a small ceremony. It was her wish to be buried quietly and in peace, I gave her that.
I tried to give her daughter and sister what they wanted even after they sat next to my wife as she died, dividing the house up between them. I bent over backward to do the best I could for them and myself and I am hated now by her daughter and sister for not letting them do as they pleased and run through my house after her death taking what they wanted. Now, Neither talks to me and both hate me, I am sorry for that, but, I did nothing wrong.
I was told I yelled at my wife’s granddaughter when she showed up for an estate sale after I warned the daughter not to come. I didn’t yell at anyone, I help the kid gather momentos, and boxed them for her, and walked with her to her car to sent her away with a huge hug. I did not hate or yell at anyone.
I was then pushed to allow the daughter in the house and i refused right till the end, it was my home and all of my stuff. Her mother left the daughter nothing in her will at all, why, simple, she has two houses and two of everything and has a job that makes her over 200 grand a year. My wife stated clearly, she doesn’t need a thing. So by law, once my wife passed all was mine and will be mine to do, as I please with.
I was generous to a fault according to everyone who knows me and witnessed it. I gave her a trailer loaded with items and an SUV full too. Now, she claims I didn’t give her everything, well, I gave a lot more than her father’s second wife gave her upon his death. She got three items from her and told me that was it, and she stated that in front of my sister and her boyfriend, and I.
After her death and burial, I received a list of items in text on my cell phone from the daughter, of all items she and her aunt wanted. I fulfilled said list, except for one item. Then I am told by the daughter, that I didn’t let her in the house like I told her mother I would, that’s true, but, it was my decision to make. Then I got told she paid two thousand dollars for her mother’s death, In fact, her mother’s death cost me 12 thousand dollars and the two grand she speaks of she spent on a reception she wanted and two obituaries she wanted in papers nowhere near where we lived. I paid all costs of medical, death, and burial myself. It was my duty as her husband and I did it, out of love. Not because I wanted my friends to come to some reception.
Once, I got the headstone for my wife’s grave that includes my name I texted the picture of it to the daughter, told her it was done, and paid for it. What I got was a speech in a text saying I can’t be friends with her, I broke promises to her mother and she blocked myself and my sister from her social media period, on Facebook and removed our phone numbers. Sadly, she now has to live with some facts. One, she went on vacation with her children as her mother was dying in a bed in my home. Why? She was told to not go and stay, she refused. She has to live with the fact she and her aunt sat across my wife’s dying body, dividing up the property and making lists of what they both wanted. I could and will never forgive either of them for that. So, she thought for sure, it would bother me when she removed us from her Facebook Page and phone guess what she learned differently.
Now my wife has been dead now over 6 months, I am alone and trying to find my way to a new life at this time with the help of my sister and her boyfriend. Will I survive it all or will depression get me, will I finish the sale of the house and the buying of a new place for myself? Time shall tell as I ride an emotional rollercoaster of shock, depression, loss, and then highs of trying to move on. Nothing has been easy or simple these days, and I don’t know for sure if I will make it through. All I can do is try!.