Well October is rolling along, fall temperatures are coming in now here in Massachusetts, the leaves are turning also. It is alittle earlier than when I was a Connecticut resident, but still the same.

As time rolls on now, I have been without my wife for fourteen months. It’s lonely, it’s hard to go on each day, I have no company, companionship to replace the loss of her. I spend my days walking, and building puzzles, and reading or watching television. I barely go out these days, I do play pool for two hours on Monday evenings with the crew here at the condos. And Then on Thursday night now I bowl with agroup from here too. Otherwise i am bored, alone, and have no one for companionship, or any rerlationship at all. Today I woke up and went out for a bit, and came back to find them wheeling out a neighbor of mine, deceased. I know it is a 55 and up community, but to see it in action and happening is tough to take for me. I am 66, and I know I am not the healthiest person around here, but, damn, to see a body roll out of here was rough on me mentally.

I know one thing I am trying hard not to get depressed over it all, but, it is rough for me. SO I carry-on the best I can daily, but again I am lonely. I spent first 12 years with one woman and my two kids, and then got divorced. No fault of my own by the way it was her fault on her side. Then I went two years without anyone until I found my second wife at a singles dance one night. We lived together 28 years, as couple and married. Sadly, I lost my wife in August of 2021 to breast cancer, that spread from breast to bone, to blood to brain, taking her from me. I stood by her to the end, hospitals, raidation, chemo, immunio theraphy. Then, hospitals again, rehab facilities and home and back thru one more time before the final 12 days of hospice at home. I will always love her but she is gone from me and there is no way to bring her back.

I sold the home, and moved away to another state here and settled in now. Yet, I have found no one near me, or any place around me to find another to love and care for or who may be interested in me, at 66 years old. Some have suggested I try internet dating sites, and i personally find them nothing but money takers, for themselves. Half the people are not even there anymore, fake profiles, and than you have the distance factor to add in, if you do it. Prices are crazy to join them in the first place and if you do find someone you like, you have to pay extra to message them and talk them into to meeting you. IT’s a scam world in my book, this internet dating site bit.

So the question remains, how do people 55 and up find people to date if they are divorced or like me widowed? Where do we go, to find others in our age range?

The world is not kind to the edlerly, or the 55 and up crowd. If you watch closely like I do, you have a hard time finding any place to even meet others. I am out of practice folks, I spent my life with one woman for 28 years, I don’t even remember where to look or how to ask someone out. Flirting is something I have never done, don’t know how folks, never learned, yet I am a 66 year old widower who was married twice, how the hell did that happen for me? I still have no answer to that one!

I bowl on Thursdays, and i play pool on Mondays, I live in anew area for me, a new state and town. I know nothing here, or anywhere near me, for things to do or events on a regular basis. I try to walk alot here in my community and play pool on monday evenings with some folks here. That is not going to help me find someone to be with is it? I dont see it that way for sure.

So, please tell me if you are from Massachuetts, and near Westborough, where do people my age go to meet others? Is there a solution to my dilimena here, I wonder?I ask those from Massachuetts and Worchester County and more, what are people my age to do, to find someone? Any Massachuetts residents have any answers for me? If so, my e-mail addy is bmccurrach20@gmail.com, send me advice and ideas here please!

Sunday has arrived and that is normally NFL Day for me. I love football as a sport to watch and understand, and yes it is fun. Though it has now twice shown how dangerous it is to play for the players. The concusions are deadly, ask the two recent players who found themselves unable to walk after hits one a Dolphin and now one a Colt.

You have grown men over three hundred pounds charging others head on and of course injuries will happen, from nroken bones to head injuries. The question is how do you stop such injuries from happening an dthat my friends and football lovers is the big question. The answer will have to be researched soon, how bad the injuries are to the two foementioned players, wil be told soon enough after testing and rehab begins. I believe if this type of motor function injury happens to a player that players timein the NFL should end, for a second such head injury could end their lives. The NFL, must set the protocols and keep players from being hit in the head a improve the helmets also.

I used to predict games here, and I was decent at it folks. Yet the league changes daily as does the power ratnkings based on injuries, drafts and coaching changes. SO, now a days I just basically watch the games for fun and entertainment.

Next subject for me, being a senior these days at 66 years old, I am finding myself alone and of course lonely. The problem is, when one is widowed like me, or even divorced, there is a fear of going out there to meet others in today’s world. Too many vultures and mean people abound. They come after you for money, and to get what they want from someone. Or you run into the trust problem and covid and more. Society today is scared of getting involved, and men and women have trrust issues. So many like myself, stay alone out of fear or out of what they deem as necessity, due to covid and attitudes and othe problems. This leads to a problem of wanting and needing companionship, to being scared of putting oneself out there to find it. It is a problem I call the edler people condonum.

Look folks, just because we are 55 and older, and divorced or widowed does not mean we are dead. We want what everyone else does too, someone to share life with, but to get there we have to overcome many things. We have emotions to overcome, we need to heal from our loses and we get people who try to tell us how soon to do it, or that we are doing so, too fast. Then we have covid to overcome and add in the basic fears and trust issues in today’s society and wham, it’s like hitting a qall out there for thos eof us over 55. W ehesitate, we stop ourselves, because we are afraid of rejection, and being taken advantage of. Yet at our ages of 55 and up, we also understand that life is about taking chances and know at some point we must do so or die alone. So what is there to do for all of us seniors out here?

Dating sites abound online, and they cost money and there is no way to be sure what you try is not ripping you off. It all can turn out to be expensive using them and, most of the time they are just players, phonies, or scams. So we don’t go there is we are smart, and most of us are, we try them once or twice then we quit. We then tend to withdraw from society and end up in bars, drinking, getting drunk in misey and giving up.

So, is there an answer to that situation and problem in American society and if so what is it folks? Anyone have any ideas, on this one? My e-mail for responses is bmccurrach20@gmail.com, for suggestions, comments or ideas. Please include response in the heading of the e-mail sent.

October 7th, 2022 has begun!. The weather is nice again, the sun is out. Each day passes slowly for me, loneliness is a key, so I try to walk alot, bowl once a week for fun, and play pool once a week too. I build puzzles, read books and chat on the internet. Seems, when you become a widower, or widow for that case too, life seems to go slower and it is harder to meet anyone to date or get to know.

Dating sites are not really usefull, if your retired and on a pension or just on Social Security and such. All cost money, so us seniors get hit with the costs when we try them, to answer someone cost money, to contact someone money, period, there is even a charge to just join the sites

They get you coming and going, as far as dating sites go, and in todays America people are wary, scared, then there is a trust issue for women and men and it is all taking a chance isn’t it? I try to be logical with these processes and sites, if I get to chatting with a woman I like, I offer to meet in public only, for coffee or a drink, and see how it goes. I am not looking for purely sexual meetings, so I guess hook-ups as they call them, I look for possible relationships, and how we get along. Am I wrong for that, or is it because i am 66 years old, that I have difficulties finding anyone around me. Distance is a problem too in my mind, gas prices are high, prices are going up left and right, and if you on a limited budget well you get the idea here.

I do live in a ne wplace for me, a new state and town, and i know nothing or how people my age meet each otjer here. So, I find myself floundering and flayling around, just walking alot, and trying to find things to do. So, I wonder if there are others out there doing the same i am. I don’t work, so, plenty of free time and I am bored.

I havent been single in 28 years, so, I have no idea how the social networks or dating networks work these days. I am old fashioned, compared to men these days who are younger. I do not understand the woke crowd stuff, either. It’s a very different world in 2022, than I am used to.

So here is what I am asking here- How do you find a partner, someone to spend time with in todays society and world in America? What should I do besides joining a dating site an dpaying to chat there? I am lost and feel like I don’t fit into the world around me here. I see trust issues happening especially for women, but also for us men. People can be cruel, mean and inconsiderate toward people they don’t know, but, life goes on I say. So how to beat the loneliness and meet people of the opposite sex, or gender in todays America is my question. So, let me ask folks, where do people 55 and up turn and what do they do to find partners for relationships out there? How would you recommend to find and meet someone in today’s world in America? Any suggestions, or ideas folks, I am listening, my e-mail addy is-bmccurrach20@gmail.com if you have comments or suggestions.

As time goes on, I am learning some things about dating sites, first is no matter which one you join, Bumble, Match, Zoosk or any of them, it costs to join one, it cost to communicate with anyone on them, and most likely you may find someone, but they are always far away from you to travel to.

Also most are geared to the younger crowds, in their 20’s to 40s, and want nothings to do with seniors in their 50 and up. When you find the Senior sites for 50 and up, and into your 60’s, again it’s all charges to find someone, talk to someone you may want to meet. Why?

IT’s a business Ladies and Gentlemen and thats how they look at it. They don’t care what your searching for or what you want a partner for, they care how much money they can get out of your pocket. Their web sites for dating cost them just for the online website, alone, and they maintain them themselves as they go along. So your paying, hundreds of a year of access to profiles to look thru and photos of people, and half of them are no longer even on these sites. So these Dating Sites on the Internet are collecting all this money and they are getting rich as the average man and woman pay to use them. Sad isn’t it?

IN the end, are there any free dating websites out there, not really. Everything costs you. I have tried one, and I wonder mostly if i am paying you one and some odd dollars to use your site, why do I have to pay to message others on it? Shouldn’t that be a part of the overall cost, for the year membership? I think it should. The other wya they get you is, unless you go back and cancel your account before the due date of it expiring they automatically charge your charge card for another year. Come on now, be realistic, what if I found someone and i am bust dating them and forget to cancel the membership, I still get billed see.

Look I am a widower, I am 66 years old, I am not a handsome, debenair man, I am an average man in America. Educated yes, on my own yes, and of course in a new area, in a new state of Massachuetts here. I want to find things to do and people to meet in Westborough Ma., my area not drive all over the state to meet women in my age range. Yet, there is no way of meeting anyone for people in my age bracket, is there. I live in a condo in a new complex, I play pool on Monday evenings here and I now bowl on Thursday night at a bowling alley on RTE 9.

I have met two women through Zoosk on line, and such. Nothing clicked of course but they were nice to talk to. Yet it cost you to maintian the search and membership eventhrough Zoosk. Other than online chat room s, and bowling, there is not much for a senior to do here in Wetsborough, yes they have a Senior Center, been there, and looked, not much folks, it’s boring. I submit just because, I am in my 60’s, does not mean I like to just sit around doing nothing at all, nor does it mean I am incapable of thinking for myself, I just need activities to do and places to meet other still active people in my age range.

Ladies and Gents, tell me, what do you do? Is there a way to find someone after your widowed in this world anymore? I miss having a wife to talk to, to communicate with, to have companionship with, to watch tv, or go to a movie with, or walk with, and more. Am I wrong fro missing that and wanting it again, I think not, but in today’s America the world is not kind enough, to think about these things for us seniors of the 50 and up range. So, we end up living alone, and becoming hermit like individuals, going thru dayto day functions and Doctors as needed, period. Fun times huh!

So tell me America, and anyone who reads this blog out there or who is in my age range, what would you suggest to do?

Comments and Suggestions please, E-mail- bmccurrach20@gmail.com

Time, in life we can’t control, just as we can not control the weather. Mankind is limited by what we can control, by the environment and and the fact the human race is limited in it’s abilities. Some things we can control, our emotions, our thoughts or lack of them, our abilities to do things physically or mentally. Even those abilities are limited my friends as is the chemical balance in our bodies and minds.

We depend on one another as a society and as a race, and at times we fail to understand that fully. I know what I am saying will bother many people, yet in the end you can’t, deny truths and facts, can you? We are limited in the amount of time we spend on this planet and the number of people we interact with and how we do so. I have had a full life in many ways, yet, I now know, I have missed too much and lost too much over time, and the things and people i have lost, cause me great concern and make me depressed. I have seen too many disappear from my life, unintentionally and by death. Sadly, I can’t, change or bring them back in any way, or even change how or why it all happened. We are forced by the world we live in and the circumstances we have to deal with what happens and move on, there is no getting them back, or changing what bad decisions we have made in life. Fate, destiny, human nature, environment, circumstances, decisions all play into how our lives go and how long we live. Does mankind as a race understand that fully? I doubt it!

I am not a scientist, Doctor, or expert in any field out there, nor am I more than a mortal man, who has lived a every day life. I have walked, talked, ran, jumped, played and worked just like all have. I am no different than anyone else man or woman, I have had victories, disappointments, joy, sadness just like all who live. Is there any doubt I am telling the truth so far, no, I do not believe anyone would say that about me. Those who know me and have known me in my life understand I do not have a reason to lie or to fabricate facts. I never have, some have even said I am far too honest and straight about things in my life. I have my failures though and many things I wish I could have changed, but couldn’t due to the facts involved and the fact I had no say in them.

At this time in my life at 66 years old, I find myself in a depressive state, and alone in life. I am not an out going person, I am not an extrovert, nor do I party. I do not drink, nor do I smoke at all or do drugs. I live alone as I said, and I have tried to enjoy the community I currently live in, yet, I am not really accepted here, except for at certain times. I don’t do bars or taverns, I am not a karaoke singer, or entertainer of any kind either. I read books, I write, I play on computers, but I do not go meet anyone in person. I isolate, scared of people and yes I do not have a very high opinion of myself at all. I fear rejection, non acceptance, and in the end people, I find them cruel, indifferent and non-caring. It’s just a fact and I have no idea how I ever lived this long.

Regrets yes, I have many, but they were not mistakes I made on my own or that I was responsible for. I had no control over many things, that is for sure. I didn’t ask to be born into the family I was born into or raised the way I was. I didn’t ask for medical problems that occurred for me as a child or as an adult either. Circumstances can not be controlled by us, and those are what bring me to where I am currently.

My regrets are many as are my disappointments, just like many others out there I am sure. We all have them and they are easy enough to live with if we try. I know that and yes I adjust for them and deal with them as I go along. It doesn’t mean I like them, or accept them or wanted them to happen, it just means I got hit with them, dealt with them in the only way I knew how and here I be.

Life is not easy for all of us, I was not born with a silver spoon or money, nor was I blessed with ease or comfort. Rich is not something I know or understand, nor would i know what to do with, really. I live day by day, on only what I have. Do you? That is called circumstance, fate, destiny, and we do not have control of it, do we?

I was never a fully accepted child by my mother, I actually believe she hated me. We fought from the day I was born until I turned 18 years old. I fought, with my elder brother also in the same way. My step-father beat us and I got the worse of it for sure. Yet in the end it was myself, who helped him rebuild the house we lived in, babysat my younger siblings and took care of them, until I left. So I served my family in that way, for most of my childhood and teen years.

When I got to 18 I made a trip on my own to meet my real father in another state. This angered my mother more, yet in the end, it needed to be done. I was told, all bad, about the man, but what I found was the opposite of all my mother told me. How bad can a man be, who, had seven more children, a home and a job he worked each day and supported it all his life till he died? He wasn’t bad, it was all just anger mom had due to the divorce.

Once i did that I basically, joined the service and moved on in life. Yes i served my country in three different branches. I started in The Army, then the Army National Guard, and then finally, the U.S. Navy when I finished, I had served a total of 16 years and had six herniated discs in my spine. During those years, I married, and had two daughters and a wife, I had two of everything, until, I was Discharged Honorably under Medical Conditions. Then, it started to go downhill for me. I lost my home, my wife and my daughters all within less than six months from my date of discharge. Now, it wasn’t my fault the marriage ended yet I was blamed and my daughters were told I was awful, I abandoned them and they ended up calling me a sperm donor.

The mental anguish from that loss has never left me, even though many years later I fought back against it. Yet, it did not turn out 100 percent the way I wished it would have. I can’t change it, so I accept it and live daily with all of it. That first marriage lasted 12 years folks.

Now I went on in life alone for two years on my own wandering the streets and trying hard to put my life back together. Ultimately, I found a woman who accepted me for who I am and we moved in together. After 7 years together we married and that marriage lasted me 28 years, ending last year in her dying of cancer, approximately 13 months ago. Her cancer was with her and we fought it for 16 years constantly, with me myself, getting lung cancer and surviving it in the middle. My wife is gone now and I miss her dearly and will forever more, I will always love her.

Today, I am 66 years old, and the loneliness gets me. I get depressed, I get sad, I feel lost and struggling to go on. Honestly speaking I have no reason to go on now. I am old, I am handicapped, I have problems mentally, and physically and I wonder what the hell I am here for anymore. I live in a 956 Square foot condo on my own and I know no one around me period. I try to associate with others and participate with events they hold here but, I end up staying home alone, staring at a tv, building puzzles and reading books. There is no place around me that I know anymore, for I live in an area that was built for 55 and older and the town is quiet. I am isolated in my opinion, there is nothing for me to do anymore.

Do I think my life is coming to an end soon, yes. I have nothing to really live for, I don’t have fun anywhere with anyone nor do I know anyone really. The loneliness and in-activeness alone will drive me stir crazy the way it is right now. I know I can’t live too much longer the way I am. For me I know the end is near, when all I do is walk, read, build puzzles and nothing more. How long can you talk to yourself and survive? Tell me please!

I turn on the television and all is violence and politics and anger. I can’t stare at that forever. I walk three miles a day when I can, I buy books when I shop for food. Puzzles I buy and build, but, honestly folks, no matter how I try to interact with others, I feel I do not belong. So when that happens I walk away and stay alone more.

I have been asked by Doctors for my PTSD treatments if I think of suicide and yes I do, at least twice a day. So I end up on medications they give me so I can sleep and then they give me pills to help with my attitude and I don’t take them, I take enough pills as it is, plus the thought of taking pills to mess with my brain and emotional state just turns me off. I more than likely should take them, they may help me, but I am scared to. I take pills for too many things these days, blood pressure, sugar, heart. and to sleep, I am beginning to feel like a pill popping fool. So, I ask how far am I from suicide, not far at all unless something changes for me.

It is now, September 17th, 2022, my wife passed August 10th, 2021. So my question is how long can I go on without her and for what reason do I want to? Unless I can find a reason to keep going and a way to do so, my depressive state will get me ultimately, like it has many before me. Time shall tell for sure folks, I walk like a cripple, I have problems standing, so in the end I am sure at some point I will go down in my condo and that is where they will find me one day.

I do not believe for me, that life is worth living much longer to be honest. Why I am here and what my purpose really is I have no idea anymore. Used to be, I had a purpose, a reason for living, a reason for going on, that all changed last year, with the death of my wife.

I lived to take care of her, to make her comfortable, to take care of her. I cooked for her, I cleaned for her, I took her to Doctors and her daughters. I took her where-ever she wished to go, watched her, sat with her. I had a purpose of just being with her, now that she is gone I have nothing left. For 28 years, we went where she wanted, did, what she wanted, and I took care of her as she wanted me to. My biggest fun times were watching television with her, playing games with her, just being with her. Today, I have none of that left to me, I am alone, no matter what anyone may think. I was told more than once by a friend, you can’t live alone, isolated, and not interact with anyone, well I do and it’s not good.

I am not a social animal or person, my opinion of myself is not good and never has been. I have trouble interacting with people in general, I suffer from PTSD from childhood and military days. I get nightmares and i sleep poorly. I basically exist, is all, and I avoid people period. I tend to walk away when I feel not wanted and i never force myself into any situation of social gatherings. I have always been a loner, an outcast and someone who does not fit in. It’s been my way of life I believe.

But as you age, and I am now 66 years old, unhealthy, in pain from back injuries from my time in service, PTSD from childhood and more. How long can I go on, I have no idea but I doubt if it will be long.

I am tired and I think basically I am giving up, each day is a struggle for me to even survive. Now, some believe I am wrong in my assessment of myself, I don’t. I fail at making friends and you can only walk so far, in life alone before you give up and walk no more.

I do not have a high opinion of myself, never have and i guess never will. AT 66 years old that opinion is even worse than ever before in my life. I am old, tired, in pain, I isolate myself, I avoid people and the fact is, I gave up. I know I am not pretty, or handsome, I know I am not the smartest person nor do I have a great sense of humor either. It’s hard for me to go on daily, I have no more motivation, no drive anymore, even my writing days have come to a basic end.

I never was a bar or tavern person, I don’t drink or smoke or do drugs. I have no real hobbies or things that give me enjoyment anymore. I once had children but no more they were taken from me. I was a loner even in the services I was a part of. So my question is simple, why am I here and what am I supposed to be doing? I have no idea anymore.

I have found if I try to go out, I don’t fit in, and it is just a fact. I don’t drink, or smoke or do drugs like I have said. I tried going to taverns and bars and found myself, alone, period, it’s just a fact. I sit in a tavern or bar, I talk to no one, so why be there. So my main question is simple, what am I here for, why am I still alive?

My typical day is coffee, and then reading a book, walking, or watching tv. There is nothing else for me. In the end I dream of and think of ways to dispose of myself. I research methods of suicide, I am depressed day by day and it only worsens for me each day.

So, why am I still here? I do not know anymore! In life, I have tried to push forward, yet, there is no reason to anymore. So, how long before, my life ends I do not know, but, like i have told others it won’t be much longer, it can’t be much longer. Life is interaction, people, things to do, I have none of it. So, when someone looks at me and goes oh stop talking that way, I smile and laugh at them and say nothing. I am old, tired, and have more medical problems than most who have lived before me. So, the pain, the loneliness, will kill me, it has to, it is fate is it not?

Reading a book, writing, building puzzles and walking is not, a life! I go through the motions is all, and that is not living to me. So what do I do next, I know I have been told by Doctors, who ask me each time I see them, are you suicidal, do you think of killing yourself, of course I would never I say. I lie, I don’t want pills, or to be locked away in an institution or hospital. I take pills daily, for all kinds of problems that are physical, diabetes, blood pressure, heart, pain from my back and neck. It’s like an endless cycle of swallowing pills, day after day, night after night. Take this for that, this to sleep, this to keep your blood pressure down, this to stop your sugars or A1C from rising, it’s crazy. I know many who have committed suicide before me, and I used to think why would they do that? Now I know why one would do that, it is obvious to me, for loneliness, isolation, leads to depression, and that is deadly my friends and I suffer through it daily. No matter how much of a good fake face I put on daily.

Many years ago, I remember a phrase, that was actually a book title, it was Death Be Not Proud, it applied to a story about someone who died unnecessarily. Yet I think it more appropriately applies to people like myself, who know the end of their lives is close.

I am 66 years old, and I feel like i am 100 at times. My body is filled with pain and I go day by day, thru the motions of living by myself. Each day I wake, early and find myself with nothing to do but watch television, read a book or build puzzles. I am bored, tired and half the time just here, I have no real reason for being anymore. Everyday is a struggle and my body aches like never before, as my body jumps and spasms from back pain and then it jumps in my sleep and wakes me.

I know many would be happy to be in my position as long as they had someone to share life with, I have no one. I live in an area of a 55 plus community, in a small town in Ma. and in the end there is nothing for a man of 66 years old to do here. I have no romantic interest at all, nor do I ask anyone out, nor does anyone invite me anywhere. I am basically isolated and alone here in a condo, and I do absolutely nothing in life.

I tried when my wife passed last year to reach out for help and I ended up in a hospital for depression for two weeks. Then, I came to Ma. with my sister and we sold my home in CT, and i bought my condo here. So, after buying the condo I am finding myself more alone than ever before in my life. I have gone through books, reading daily, I have gone through building puzzles and walking long distances per day.I am not a social person in reality, I am a lone wolf, but it is bad for me. I have been told my depressive state is not a good sign for my health, and whatever future I have left. I know from personal experience over my 66 year old life, that I lose interest fast and that my being alone is dangerous for my mind wanders to dying myself.

Yes, I have considered suicide many time sin different ways, but I have stopped short so far. It doesn’t mean I won’t go out that way tho. More than likely I will, I lack social skills I have all my life, I have no ability to interact or even to flirt I never did learn that one. I do not laugh a lot for there is not much to laugh about nor do I smile much these days. I know I am a sad site to see for many who see me. It is my problem you see, I shy away from people, I hide and in the end I am alone as always. Life is not really worth living for me, but, I awake each day, and each one becomes a greater struggle to keep going. At times I only sleep more and to get thru the day to my bed at time to sleep more. No I do not drink and no I do not do drugs of any kind except medications I am prescribed. I don’t find bars or taverns fun, either.

I find people to be cruel at times, or to be foolish, and sometimes annoying and my ability to interact makes it that much worse for me. I avoid people. Some may wonder why, I just can’t handle it much longer, is what I believe.

Do I own a gun no, can I kill myself if I want yes, I can. I have medications and I live on the fourth floor of a condo complex. Have I thought of doing so, yes about three times a day actually. I also know, that if i continue in the way I am currently, it won’t be long that I am around.

Can I change anything, to make it less depressing or to make myself care more about living, I honestly doubt it at this point in life. I know I have lost too much in my life, and it is hard for me to see alight at the end of the tunnel I am in, it is dark.

I know now, I am not a person many care about, nor do I feel like someone cares. IT is a sad, feeling in me, and it is hard to shake no matter what I do. Can I survive much longer and how long will I? I have no real idea, to be honest, the way I see it I have served my purpose on this planet. I served my parents growing up, I served in the service for 16 years in three branches, I served my first wife and tried to serve my children, and then I served my second wife for 28 years. Now, I am alone, and to be honest, I know I shall die alone, probably in this condo, for I shall never move again. As my will to live and continue on wanes and disappears, do I have regrets, yes, but doesn’t everyone who lives?

I also watch the news and see the destruction of the world and even America as a democracy and Republic now. Sadly, America is too weak to take charge of what is happening to it. As a nation we were dumb when Trump was Elected President. Sadly, even Justice and equality under it is damaged as Trump walks free still and those who did his bidding during Jan. 6th and since and before, go to jail. The Department of Justice is not acting fast enough, Congress has fools in it and the Senate too who still back Trump, after his taking Secret and above documents out of the White House to his home. Why?

As Far as the current mess/ fiasco, with Donald J. Trump, I wish to say this, one woman took one secret document home and got 5 years in prison for it, The Rosenberg’s got the electric chair for their actions, and Benedict Arnold was banished from America for his actions. So, when will Justice for ALL and Equal Treatments under The Law come to bear here in this Trump fiasco? Please tell me folks. is Donald J. Trump above the laws of America, is he better than you or I, and does he deserve special treatment? If you took home secret or above documents, from the government, or incited an insurrection, do you think you would be eating steaks in Mar a Lago, or playing golf all day on the tax payers dime? I doubt it, you would be locked up and the key thrown away by now, and so would I. So why isn’t Donald J. Trump? Explain please!

Labor Day, 2022 has arrived folks, here in America. The Temperatures have begun to drop some, there is a slight chill in the air in the am. The sun still shines but for shorter hours, and time keeps rolling on.

The economy is expensive in America, food prices have gone up, car prices, gone up, gas has gone up, even people who commit violence have gone up in numbers. The cost of being alive in this world has just risen day by day. It’s amazing how things change, and people have to struggle to see through, yes even here in America. The world is not a kind and generous place like some would like us to see or believe, it is in fact a cruel world, that asks daily what have you done for me, before it allows you to be provided for in anyway. No one hands you a damn thing, unless you earn it or pay for it in someway.

While many struggle to survive day by day, and are gullible and foolish enough to follow so, called, leaders like Trump, they don’t stop to think of the consequences, do they? At some point, someone has to go to the jails and prisons, where these people who participated in the January 6th, attack on the U.S. Capital are, that Donald J. Trump told them to do, and ask them as they serve their terms, How do you feel now, that you have been convicted as a felon, and imprisoned, as Donald J. Trump walks free? Your so-called leader is walking free around Mar a Lago eating steaks and living in splendor, as you sit in a cell, for your sentence. Are you happy you did as he told you to now? I bet they are no happier than former enforcer and lawyer.

I can go on here, but what is the use? Look, America is tired of the Trump fiasco being played out currently. In the end the real question that remains and is waiting to be answered is will Donald J. Trump ever be ,indicted, arrested, and tried in a court of law for what he has done to America? Every news agency, on television and radio and in papers and magazines, are all covering this, and all of it is saturating the american public. Anger abounds from die-hard Trump supporters and Maga people, violence is being threatened. Sadly, it is all because, one man decided he couldn’t handle losing an election. Then, he compounded it all by the insurrection and attack on the capital, refused to concede the election, tried to overturn it and then, slinked, out of Washington, DC, to Florida, and took secret and above documents to his home, breaking more laws then any Ex-President in American History! We all know of it all, and yet no one is charging him, someone please explain why?

I will say this, The Rosenburgs were electrocuted for Treason, a woman took one document home marked secret and got 5 years in jail for it. Now Donald J. Trump takes home over 314 secret or above documents, to his estate, leaves them laying around for people to see, and he is still walking free, how is this possible?

We need Congress, to get together and number one, ban Trump from running or holding any public office in America, Period. Second, The DOJ needs to assemble it’s case and evidence, indict and charge Donald J. Trump now, and arrest, him. Lets end this fiasco, this show and take away his platform he is using to incite the Maga people with. Didn’t they do enough damage to the Capital, and why do we have to pay for it to be fixed, when a billionaire is the one who incited it all? Shouldn”t Trump be footing that bill?

If Donald J. Trump is allowed to run for President again, then you may as well have kept Benedict Arnold as General when this nation was created. Donald Trump is a bigger criminal and traitor to America than Arnold was! He is the modern day Benedict Arnold, he sold us out to other countries.

What purpose did Trump have for all the secret and above documents he had in his possession? Why did he have them and what was his intent with them? Who did he show them to, and why? What information was in them, what secrets did he give out to our adversaries? Stop and think about this now, what purpose did Donald J. Trump have with these documents? Did he sell them to other nations? Did he give them to other nations? Was he going to use them to blackmail the American Government, so he could try to get the Presidency back? What was his purpose in having them please explain to me! 314 Secret or above documents, taken from Washington, DC. by a former President, and held for up to 17 months, why? As Bill Barr the former Attorney General said, ” There is no excuse for Donald J. Trump, having these documents, none what so ever!” No excuse, no reason can justify it folks!

One more thing I wish to mention here, Trump asked the court for a Master to review the documents taken from his estate. He did so by carefully avoiding the Judge who was handling the case in the first place, and going to a Judge he appointed himself. Now shouldn’t this second Judge be taken out of the case, and not be involved due to the fact she was appointed by Trump to the bench? I think so. Also, why is a second Judge being involved in a case already being taken care of by a prior Judge already handling the case? And can she really overrule the Judge involved already? Shouldn’t be folks!

At some point in time, Justice must prevail, it must be dealt out evenly and without favoritism, or preference, to yes, even former Presidents. I was born under Eisenhower, and I have lived through many Presidents now in my 66 years of life. I study American History and I watch the news, I watched JFK get killed on tv like many who were kids at the same time I was. I have read of Washington, the creation of The United States, the Founding Fathers and how we became a nation, a republic and a democracy that the world admires. Now I see things cleared because i am older, I see the tearing down of a once proud nation, by a movement that is unrealistic and unlawful, and dangerous, this MAGA movement, is dangerous for America, it is dangerous for our future and the very foundation our country is built on.

No President in American history has refused to show their tax returns, no President in American History has been Impeached twice in office in one term, no President had refused to concede an election when they lost and set up an insurrection against his very own administration and asked people to hang his own Vice President, till now! No President slinks out of Washington to go home, with Top Secret Documents, stores them openly and insecurely in his home and then claims they are no more than, like a library book being overdue when he is caught.Why would a American President take Top Secret Document, hold them, for 17 months, and force the FBI to come get them. Please explain! What purpose did taking the documents have, what was he going to do with them,who was he going to show them to? Is it Putin and Russia, is it Kim and the Koreans, and how bad did he compromise our security as a nation?

This Trump fiasco, started when he refused to concede defeat when he lost the election in 2020. It has now continued on into 2022 in September, and it needs to end. What needs done, is #1) Donald J. Trump must be banned from running for any public office in America. #2) Donald J. Trump needs indicted, charged and tried in a court of law, for the charges brought forth by the DOJ. His trial must be public and shown to all, to show no one is above the laws of the United States. 3) Someone should go interview those already in prison and convicted from his insurrection and ask them how they feel now, behind bars and Trump walking around free? Secret and above documents are not library books folks, the documents represent the safety of the American People, you and I and our country, and the people who handle that security for us. Donald J. Trump took them for his own purposes to his home in Florida, Mar A Lago, for what purpose or reason, and who wa she going to show them to? You tell me. This MAGA crowd needs to be broken up, torn apart, disassembled and banished, just like the fascist and Nazi regiemes of World War 2, before it takes hold and destroys America. We do not do Dictators here in America!

To Merick Garland, Attorney General of The United States, you have the charges, the documents, the proof and more, how much longer will it take to secure a case against Donald J. Trump, and to indict, charge and arrest him? What more is needed to do so? There has to come a time, when Trump has to be indicted and tried for crimes against America, and for breaking it’s laws, that time should be now! The American People, want this to end as soon as possible, we are tired of the daily news of it, and the step by step reporting of it on our radios, televisions, and in our papers. We look like idiots as a nation, because no one is arresting this man and he is getting away with it all. Are you scared because he is an Ex-President, are you scared because he is a billionaire? Are you scared because his Maga People are threatening riots? What is it Attorney General Garland please tell us. For as I see it as an American Citizen and Disabled Veteran who served his country for 16 years, you are allowing Trump his freedom and showing because he is an Ex-President he is above the law to all us tax payers. He deserves to be treated like all citizens of this country, held accountable under the laws of our land and dealt with. Indict Donald J. Trump, lock him up!

As August 31st has hit and August of 2022 rolls to a close today, we are still dealing with The Trump fiasco, daily. New Agencies and television stations, and newspapers world-wide shout about it all, Republicans defend Trump and want him as their candidate for President in 2024, even though they know he may be arrested for crimes against his own country.

Look folks, it is time these Trump Supporters, Maga, people get the idea they are backing a dead horse here. He has failed ,at so much in his life and yet they still back him, why? The list of his failures is huge, yet they want to back him, why, because they can’t find a decent replacement. They don’t have one among their numbers, who can stand up to a Presidential Race at all. Trump is done folks, if your a Trump Supporter, Maga Person, of any kind you have to see it now.

As more of his followers who supported and participated in his January 6th, attack on the capital to stop the certification of the election go to prison each day and get convicted. I bet if you talk to them now, who are sitting in cells, they are not too happy about it all, and that Trump is still walking free. Anyone want to take that bet on?

Now, Trump got caught taking classified documents out of the White House, to his Mar A Lago, home in Florida. What the big question is, is simple why and what was his purpose in doing so, and what did he think he was going to do with them? I don’t care about all the bullshit he is throwing up against the wall, trying to delay the process of law here, what I care about is simple, who saw the documents, who did he show them to and for what purpose and what damage did he do to our country and security? Answer the one question, Lindsey Graham and other MAga and Trump supporters, What did Donald Trump have the documents for and what was his purpose for them and who was he going to show them to? Please just answer the primary question here, what was Donald Trump doing with all these classified documents in Mar a Lago, unsecured? There can be only one purpose to him, having them, to use them against a political opponent or to show them to a foreign power, period. Thais called Treason folks, blackmailing America, all over the fact he lost an election! The truth has to come out now, he has no place to hide, and his lawyers will not win, if he is indicted. There is no Executive Privilege for an Ex-President folks! Nor is there any Attorney Client Privilege involved in this case, why because ,the documents do not belong to Donald Trump, they are the American People’s. No President in American History, has ever done what Trump has done here. Let me say this to his Maga and Supporters of him, if you took one item classified from the American Engorgement to your home, where do you think you would be right now? You would be in an orange jumpsuit behind bars is where! Want proof go ask the woman who took one document home marked secret and got five years in prison for it. Donald J. Trump is guilty no matter how he tries to avoid, run, hide or claim special treatment or privileges, none apply to him. He is no longer a President, folks, he is another American Citizen who tried to steal documents from his own country, for his own purposes.

I remind all, of The Rosenbergs who died in the electric chair for selling secrets to other countries. To me Donald J. Trump is a Benedict Arnold, a traitor to his country, we should ban him from holding any public office in America and we should either indict and convict and jail him, or banish him to another country, expel him from America. Congress needs to ban Donald J. Trump from running for or holding any Public Office in America period, immediately.